I sit here with my coffee (number 3 I think) on one of my half days off this week.. and I'm musing over things.. regrets/ wishes/hopes and dreams...
I'm 45 and definitely not where I wanted to be financially at this point in life.. I work two jobs that average about 10 dollars an hour.. I average approximately 75 hours a week and am not home much at all..
not a great place to be... at least for me right now..
don't get me wrong.. I'm here because of decisions that I have made and some that others have made for me.. and I'm here because we have a plan to not be here for much longer. but it isn't much fun..
I also feel that we are in a waiting period..a holding period.. a period that is betwixt and between..
I'm relatively driven to succeed at what I do..and usually have a plan of what comes next.. right now I don't.. and that my friends is weird.. weirder still is the fact that I know, that I know, that I know something is coming down the road that is going to be a game changer.
A little background.
6 years ago we moved back to Maine from New Hampshire.. family considerations made the decision relatively easy for us.. sold our home and bought a home after renting for a year.. 6 months after that I lost my job..sold that home with Gods grace and moved to a rental home that my inlaws owned..bought that home and then sold that to purchase the home we are in now.
we live in my wifes grandparents home.. it needs work.. we knew it when we bought it and we know it now.
we have/had plans to pay it off and build a new home on this lot which is a fantastic intown lot with the feel of being in the woods.
and yet.. we don't believe that we will stay here... both my wife and I have sensed that it is time to move/leave to transition to another place..another something.. but we have no idea what it is at this point.
a new job.. a new place to live.. a new...or is it rather just something different.
sometimes I feel like I assume Joshua felt.. the promised land is over there.. I can almost taste it but... it's not ready.. or I'm not ready... and so I wait on what would could or should be..
so having done all.. I will stand... waiting.. expecting... trying desperately to see through the fog in the mirror
Monday, July 25, 2011
Friday, July 8, 2011
the unpleasant unexpected..
This is one of the first blog posts I ever wrote.. almost 4 years ago.. for another blog I had..
liked it and wanted it on this one.. :)
THE UNPLEASANT UNEXPECTED
The unpleasant unexpected. What is the unpleasant unexpected??? it is the things that occur that affect us but we didn't plan for. Simply put we don't like them and we weren't planning on them but in the end they become used of God for the good of those around us and for ourselves. What do I mean? we don't plan to lose our job or to have spouse die or to be accused of something we didn't do but these things happen. Do they have a benefit down the road.. yeah they do..We may not even begin to understand why but in the end they have great benefit, take Elisabeth Elliot. She lost her husband early in her life to the people that they were trying to minister to... (through the gates of splendor) Could it get much more horrible than that?I don't think so.. and yet.. what occurred after was greater than what could have occurred if it had not occurred. so while the unpleasant unexpected occurred the end result was a great victory for the LORD. Paul experienced the unpleasant unexpected many times in his life and yet he knew that it was for the best that these things happen. they weren't pleasant. they weren't expected and yet... the end result was positive..; in labors more abundantly, in prisons more abundantly, in stripes above measure, in deaths oft. 24 Of the Jews five times received I forty stripes save one. 25 Thrice was I beaten with rods, once was I stoned, thrice I suffered shipwreck, a night and a day have I been in the deep; 26 in journeyings often, in perils of rivers, in perils of robbers, in perils from my countrymen, in perils from the Gentiles, in perils in the city, in perils in the wilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren; 27 in labor and travail, in watchings often, in hunger and thirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness.2 Cor 11:22-27 (ASV)32 In Damascus the governor under Aretas the king guarded the city of the Damascenes in order to take me: 33 and through a window was I let down in a basket by the wall, and escaped his hands.2 Cor 11:32-33 (ASV)Did Paul expect these things? were they pleasant? NO. They were not and yet...For Gods Glory these things occurred,2 Count it all joy, my brethren, when ye fall into manifold temptations; 3 Knowing that the proving of your faith worketh patienceJames 1:2-3 (ASV)Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds James 1:2 NivIt was through the unpleasant unexpected that God was able to show who he was to Paul and to Elisabeth Elliot.Are you in a time of the unpleasant unexpected? Consider it pure Joy.For it is in these times that God reveals himself in ways that one cannot fathom before...It is in these times that God shows us a different side of who he is than we have seen before...it is in these times that God shows us a personlity of his we have never seen beforeCount it all Joy when the unpleasant unexpected comes knocking on your door..because...........we have no idea what is beyond the unpleasant unexpected
The unpleasant unexpected. What is the unpleasant unexpected??? it is the things that occur that affect us but we didn't plan for. Simply put we don't like them and we weren't planning on them but in the end they become used of God for the good of those around us and for ourselves. What do I mean? we don't plan to lose our job or to have spouse die or to be accused of something we didn't do but these things happen. Do they have a benefit down the road.. yeah they do..We may not even begin to understand why but in the end they have great benefit, take Elisabeth Elliot. She lost her husband early in her life to the people that they were trying to minister to... (through the gates of splendor) Could it get much more horrible than that?I don't think so.. and yet.. what occurred after was greater than what could have occurred if it had not occurred. so while the unpleasant unexpected occurred the end result was a great victory for the LORD. Paul experienced the unpleasant unexpected many times in his life and yet he knew that it was for the best that these things happen. they weren't pleasant. they weren't expected and yet... the end result was positive..; in labors more abundantly, in prisons more abundantly, in stripes above measure, in deaths oft. 24 Of the Jews five times received I forty stripes save one. 25 Thrice was I beaten with rods, once was I stoned, thrice I suffered shipwreck, a night and a day have I been in the deep; 26 in journeyings often, in perils of rivers, in perils of robbers, in perils from my countrymen, in perils from the Gentiles, in perils in the city, in perils in the wilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren; 27 in labor and travail, in watchings often, in hunger and thirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness.2 Cor 11:22-27 (ASV)32 In Damascus the governor under Aretas the king guarded the city of the Damascenes in order to take me: 33 and through a window was I let down in a basket by the wall, and escaped his hands.2 Cor 11:32-33 (ASV)Did Paul expect these things? were they pleasant? NO. They were not and yet...For Gods Glory these things occurred,2 Count it all joy, my brethren, when ye fall into manifold temptations; 3 Knowing that the proving of your faith worketh patienceJames 1:2-3 (ASV)Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds James 1:2 NivIt was through the unpleasant unexpected that God was able to show who he was to Paul and to Elisabeth Elliot.Are you in a time of the unpleasant unexpected? Consider it pure Joy.For it is in these times that God reveals himself in ways that one cannot fathom before...It is in these times that God shows us a different side of who he is than we have seen before...it is in these times that God shows us a personlity of his we have never seen beforeCount it all Joy when the unpleasant unexpected comes knocking on your door..because...........we have no idea what is beyond the unpleasant unexpected
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
A New Start
Greetings..
A new start blogging.. :)
why a distant land? I have a great amount of wanderlust right now..ready to pick up and move..anywhere but here.. It won't happen but...
The plan for this blog is to really put some effort into it.. less writing and more thought..
thats it for now...
I will see you tomorrow..
A new start blogging.. :)
why a distant land? I have a great amount of wanderlust right now..ready to pick up and move..anywhere but here.. It won't happen but...
The plan for this blog is to really put some effort into it.. less writing and more thought..
thats it for now...
I will see you tomorrow..
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